But don't weep for me // Closed

[aban_aqun]

WHO: the Iron Bull aban_aqun and Dorian Pavus bestdressed
WHAT: Someone manages to tail the Iron Bull. He doesn't like it.
WHERE: the beach outside Kyst
WHEN: some time after quests are assigned
WARNINGS: Paranoia, possible PTSD references. Will update as needed.



Bull found the note days ago. It'd been in his pocket after he left Dorian, which means someone had to have followed him and gotten close enough to slip it in his pocket without him noticing. Or worse, they'd put it there while the pants were discarded somewhere. Bull tells himself he would have noticed if someone had crept into the room but-- at some point they'd been sleeping.

He's been hyper-vigilant since then: watching, listening, observing. Looking for shadows that move, people that linger too long or look out of place. How had they done it? Bull was Ben-Hassrath for more than twenty years, he survived Seheron by virtue of the fact that he couldn't be surprised or taken off-guard.

But someone here had managed it. Not only had they managed it, but it's likely that they knew about him and Dorian. That's what sent cold dread sinking through him. He debated whether or not to tell the mage from the moment he found the note. Not telling him could keep him safe. It could also put him at risk. There is no right answer, no way to minimize damage, no way to mitigate risk.

So the next time they plan to meet, Bull changes their meeting place at the last minute: the beach outside of Kyst rather than in the city itself. He's made sure that Dorian wouldn't suspect anything at least until now. But he needs to tell him. Dorian can't defend himself if he doesn't know.

Bull stares at the sea and for a moment he's far away, decades ago. He can hear the sounds. He can smell Seheron.

Comments

[bestdressed]

"I understand," Dorian bites out, and absolutely loathes it. He does realize to some extent why they shouldn't speak while Bull is completing this task, though he's deeply dissatisfied with not knowing more details. Why can't Bull tell him more about it? It isn't as though he's going to share such sensitive information with anyone else.

He tries to tell himself that it isn't because Bull doesn't trust him, but because Bull doesn't want to involve him in such a potentially dangerous matter. Yet in some ways, that almost feels like the same thing.

"I take that we won't be spending the night together, then," he says, quietly resigned.

[aban_aqun]

Bull doesn't want to deny Dorian anything. He doesn't want to deny either of them this chance to be together, but his expression mirrors the resignation in Dorian's voice. It isn't safe.

"I don't know how long they've been following me... us. Kyst isn't safe."

And if they managed to slip the note into his pocket while he and Dorian were together, Bull doesn't want to risk a more violent message. He leans down to gently touch his forehead to Dorian's.

"I'm sorry, kadan."

He should be better than this. He should have caught this when it happened, before it happened.

[bestdressed]

"Don't be," Dorian sighs, and lets himself rest more fully against Bull, curling into his form. Their brows touch, and with a slight tilt of his chin, Dorian's lips press to Bull's for a brief, absolving kiss. "It isn't your fault."

He knows well that Bull wants to spend time together as much as he does. This is painful and frustrating for both of them. His hands rest against Bull's broad chest, feeling it rise and fall, the warmth of his skin. Maker, he misses this--just this.

"I miss you," he admits aloud, still somewhat surprised by how easy he finds it. It's been a long time since he's worried about not being missed in return.

[aban_aqun]

"I miss you," he murmurs. Bull squeezes his arms around Dorian and nuzzles against his hair like he's trying to cover himself in the mage's familiar scent. He doesn't like this. He doesn't like the places his mind drifts to as he considers what he must do.

And he doesn't like that Dorian has his own mission to face alone. It isn't even that he doubts Dorian's abilities, but this place is still relatively unknown to both of them.

"Let's stay and watch the sun set, at least."

[bestdressed]

"At the very least," Dorian agrees, and promptly stands on tip-toe to bury his face between Bull's neck and shoulder, where he won't see much of anything, let alone the sunset. But this is far more important.

He does drag himself away eventually, and arrange himself more properly against Bull's side to watch the sun sink over the waves. He hates that even with an arm around his waist, he feels far away already.